Learn mindsets and tips on how to stay empowered and peacefully present in all circumstances.
Learn mindsets and tips on how to stay empowered and peacefully present in all circumstances.
Good afternoon, everyone. Glad to be sharing this beautiful day with you. We have and have sunshine today here in Vancouver, so hopefully a lot of you are getting outside and getting a walk in your neighborhood. And today I’m going to be sharing with you how to stay in the power of you. And so you’re welcome to join me at any time on this live webinar and ask questions either on Ziu or feel free to post questions on Facebook and I’ll answer the questions as we go along.
And so today I will be talking with you about the topic of how to maintain the ability to stay in the power of you and what that feels like, what it looks like, how to get back to it if you lose it, how to cultivate it, how to cultivate a field or for being in the power of you and what what that means even. And so I’ll begin with what it means and sustain the power of you is all about staying in a place of where you are your most resourceful, your most peaceful, your most powerful, your most responsive to existence.
And so when you’re in the power of you, what happens is you feel an incredible peace within yourself and that peace not only radiates out from you, but it carries you in and through your life in ways that are very empowering. And so what I mean by that is when you are experiencing the energy of being in a peaceful place within yourself. You feel calm and. I would stay awake and aware in a very beautiful way. And so what happens is let’s say somebody is in your field, whether it’s when you’re in your family environment or if it’s in your work environment or even just anywhere out in life, you could be at the store or at the park or or interacting with people at an event.
Essentially, if you find yourself going into a contracted state, depending on who you’re interacting with, it’s kind of a sign that you’re kind of going out of that power state. What’s really important is if you notice other people who are being aggressive or their energy fields contracting in any way, it makes you feel uncomfortable in that in those places you can go into an energy within you or a state of consciousness is probably the better way to describe it, where you can actually be free of the influence of that.
And also, at the same time, you really still and present and cultivate that field of presence, such an incredible power in being able to it to be still to be available without making up a story about yourself or making up a story about the other person. And so in this is what’s really helpful is. Is when you can be free of those stories. Then you can go to a place where you’re just not creating any type of drama for yourself, in your mind or within the minds of others with your energy is not creating drama.
You’re just in a place of neutrality. And even if someone projects something on you when you’re in this place of neutrality, then what happens is you feel an incredible piece within yourself, no matter what anybody’s doing around you. And that lack of drama for you, to you is incredibly empowering when you start to get into these states of empowerment in this way. It’s it’s. As you interact more and more with people and maintain this state of staying in the power of you, it becomes a new normal in a new normal where you are able, even when major events happen or major circumstances happen, you know exactly how to respond to those circumstances because you’re so ultra present within yourself.
And so one of the ways to feel or to to create this kind of environment for you to be in your power is to. Is to practice whenever you have the opportunity, no matter what, if you’re faced with some situation in relationship to someone else, for you can actually use all of those moments to practice being present.
So even if you get triggered, if you can go into choosing to be present, choosing to free yourself from whatever it is that you might be triggered by, and just going back to full presence of a really simple trick to doing this, that you can use basically your eyes to be able to create this kind of level of presence. So what you do is you you rest your eyes on the person you’re with or the situation you’re in. And so in the room, your eyes are resting on that person.
Maybe it’s their nose or part of their face or their eyes or something like that. And at the same time, you take the whole room in and when you take the whole room and what happens is your mind starts to pay attention to the room and stops focusing on creating stories. And when you are taking them in and the whole room and and you’re actually taking in what they’re what they’re saying. At the same time, all these things are happening, the mind goes into a kind of restful state, a kind of neutral state, and so this state of presence is a really great way to practice this.
And if you happen to have social anxiety, this is another really amazing technique to use, not just if somebody is being negative in some way, but if you’re in a situation where you are entering into a situation where you’re already feeling contracted through worry, anxiety, fear. And so as we go into a space that you can practice being in this expanded field of attention, you will feel much more. If when you go into a social situation, you feel socially anxious as well.
There are a few other tips that you can do to help to to surrender into place of awareness. And one of the things is to actually really accept the anxiety or the or the fear and to acknowledge it. And so beforehand, before you go into a social situation, you can actually say I choose to surrender to the anxiety. I say yes to the anxiety. I say yes to the fear or whatever it is. And when you say yes to the fear, when you say yes to the worry, it’s not it’s not that you’re trying to create more or anything like that.
It’s that you’re letting go of your fear of it. Never leave. And so as you go into it, it makes it easier to imagine surrendering to it. It makes it easier for you to just drop off, especially the anxiety part, because the anxiety comes up because of the fear of the fear. And so it’s important to let that go. So then what you want to do is also when you’re in social situations, if you have social anxiety, this could be at work, too.
If you have social anxiety at work, doesn’t have to be just like a social function. One of the things that you can do is to imagine yourself as a social butterfly and that you’re not necessarily going to choose just any flower or any plant to land on. You can see yourself kind of have a vision of yourself before you go into a space as then if you want to use a social event, you can. But you see yourself envision yourself as a social butterfly flitting from one person to the next landing on in certain places and but basically see yourself making your way around the room.
And then in this experience, one thing that’s really important to one thing that’s really important to recall is that not everyone is going to find you interesting and that’s OK. And you’re not going to find everybody interesting. However, when you go up and you interact with somebody socially or you interact with somebody at work. And this can even be a family, of course, when you go up, you can enter into a conversation, enter into the type of relationship where you allow the person to feel whatever they feel.
You allow yourself to feel whatever you feel and know that everybody else, almost everybody else, is feeling that level of nervousness or social anxiety. There’s people that are really free and thrive on social events. So people really love it for the most part. Most people feel that kind of level of anxiety. And if you can be invitational as you approach someone and give them the opportunity to to answer questions and just get to know them by simply getting curious about them, asking them really empowering questions, like it can be simple as as what’s the best part of your week or what what did you love about about 12 and 19?
Or it could be anything but something empowering, something that they can kind of pause for a moment and think and and you can create some real intimacy with strangers in this way and intimacy, meaning connection. And so when you do that and they’re answering and you have a listening attention, they feel heard and it helps them relax. It also helps you relax because you’re not having to do the talking and always have some of these questions in your back pocket that you can ask people.
And then when when it feels right, move on to the next person. If you come across someone where you have a hard time interacting with them, it’s OK. It’s you’re not going to connect with everyone and not everyone’s going to have social skills to connect. And just also know, some people absolutely have zero social skills. And it’s not that they’re rejecting you in any way. It’s that they just maybe don’t know how to communicate effectively. And so you can do the best you can and then move on and that sort of thing.
But getting back to morrow, staying in your power when you feel a contraction within yourself because of of maybe someone who’s aggressive or someone whose energy doesn’t feel the best for you. One of the things that you can do. Is to understand one of the most important things I believe in interaction with interacting with anyone in the world, and that is. Every time you meet anyone who’s in a contracted state, it’s really important for you to understand that they’re hurting at a very deep level if you can hold that wisdom within you.
You can interact with them from that place of compassion. And when you understand that you start making their behavior an attack against you or something that they’re doing against you or to you. And when you come into a place with that wisdom of compassion and understanding, then you’re you’re very free. And then people can be grumpy, they can be aggressive, they can do whatever they’re doing. And you remain free to decide for yourself how you want to respond.
And responding might be very well be that you move into a space that they’re not. It could be that you move into an even deeper compassion for them and ask them, like, I sense that maybe you’re not having a great day today. How are you feeling? And it might be what they what they most need for the day. And so having this wisdom, compassion allows you to be in this place of neutrality within yourself, allows you to be in a place where you’re not hurting yourself and you’re not projecting blame on them or further creating any type of energy dynamics of of confrontation or conflict.
You can just be the neutral party. And it really is an incredibly powerful, empowering thing to be in that place. It doesn’t mean that you won’t ever feel sad or triggered or anything else. If you if you do feel trigger being in a place where you allow yourself to feel the vulnerability of that trigger is important to you. That means even if you end up crying, if it can be OK for you to cry, even in public, in a social situation, and you can just say, you know, you can share with the person how you’re being triggered.
And I remember this one situation where someone had said to me one time I came out to talk with them. I was on a break from work, came up to talk with them and and I asked them how things were. And they started to go into a very contracted state. And it was quite an aggressive state. And they said to me, oh, I just would like if you stop judging me, that was really surprised. And I was like I was like, oh, I just came out to talk with you.
I was on my break. I just came out to chitchat with you and see how you were. And I had like, this real open heart. It was I was in this place of just trying to connect and everything, but I didn’t take it personally. And I told them this like instead of me getting upset, angry with them for accusing me of or something like that, I was really in this place of love and compassion for them. And I wondered I was curious.
Curiosity is such a powerful tool for staying in the power of you, because if somebody behaves in a way that’s confusing to you, confusion is almost always at the root of complex emotional conflicts. If you can, instead of going into getting lost and confusion, if you can go, hey, I’m going to get curious and find out what’s really going on with this person. And if if they’re not willing to share it with me, I’m not going to tell any stories about what’s going on.
I’m just going to trust they’re having a bad day or something’s going on emotionally for them. And so with this person, I just asked, you know, I told them that I was there to support them and to connect with them. And they apologized to me once they realized that they had they were in their own mind and creating a story about me. And they were so grateful. They gave me a big hug and and they were able to relax and they were able to share with me their their own insecurity.
And in general and it gave me some insight because a lot of people are walking around with insecurities and you might trigger their insecurity and not even know that’s what’s going on. And they may never share it with you. But with trust me, there’s almost but most people are walking around with with a bag full of insecurities. And so sometimes we’re bound to trigger each other. And if we can stay really loving, open hearted place around it, then there’s an advantage for us, certainly.
But also it it starts to like repair conflicts within people. So then we become these walking beautiful, vibrating with love and compassion beings. They’re going into the world doing amazing work just by having conversations with people where we stay in this neutral place of presence, holding the sacred balance. And this is like an incredible invitation. And I’m speaking about us being in a place where you become like a. Like a martial artist in your life when it comes to emotions and so this this work that you can do is simply walking into the world can be a place where you you are literally shining light and love, compassion and wisdom, unconditional love and unconditional love is a state of consciousness.
It’s a state of consciousness that says, I understand that if you’re angry or upset or something’s going on, that you’re there’s something unresolved within you. And it’s not about me. So I’m going to I’m going to share with you a part of my my book, The Fluorocarbon, there’s my favorite. I always read this. If you if you’re attending my webinar, I probably read a couple of times this week, but I love this paragraph. The paragraph is a divine transmission.
And so the Divine had me write this. I didn’t write this myself and say that I did it and I love it. It makes absolute sense in this theme of staying in power. You, in fact, on the book, it’s it’s actually divine in Bulle stay in the power of you. So the Divine is actually inviting us to stay in our power and to not lose ourselves in other relationships. All right. So it says, stay in the power of you in any given moment.
You can be in the power of you simply by being present in this moment without the fantasies of the past or the future. If someone is mean to you, you lose yourself. When you allow a thought that you’re being hurt or there is something wrong with you, simply stay with the present moment. The fact that person is expressing anger at you or towards you, stop making it about you. Let it be about their experience. You don’t have to join them there, nor do you have to conjure up a negative fantasy about you.
You don’t have to reject them, nor do you have to reject yourself. You can simply be an unconditional witness to their action. Stay in the power of you, well, then it goes on. Anyway, there’s a lot more. But if you’re interested to read, The More the flower pot and its great book, that paragraph is beautiful. I think we forget sometimes just how easy it is for for us to be triggered and. And so when we get triggered in this way, the faster we can remember that we’ve been triggered and that other people are getting triggered easily to the faster we can remember our own, that we’ve been triggered within ourselves, the faster we can wake back up into a state of pure awareness.
When you’re in that you’re aware state, that’s when you’re in the power of you.
And so one of the easiest ways to do this is to know that any time you feel a physical body contraction. Of either your throat or your heart center, your solar plexus, your your abdomen or any part of your body could be a tightening of your jaw or if ever you feel an emotional conflict, sadness, anger, frustration, any type of what feels terrible type of emotion, the opposite of joy. Any time you feel those states, it’s it’s because you’ve been triggered in some way.
And if you’ve been watching some of my videos, I all I always have to say this because this is so important and one of the easiest ways to really get out of a hole of emotional conflict is so important that you identify what triggered you. Now could have been something someone said, like, for example, someone that made a statement. Maybe it’s the way they said it doesn’t matter, but somebody made a statement and the way they said it and then you had an emotional or physical response.
And know what you want to do is you want to actually identify between those states what it is that you told yourself, because one hundred percent of the time you will have lied to yourself. And we want to find what that law is, because it’s one thing to go, OK, I’ve been triggered and go, OK, I’m going to come back into the power of myself. If you don’t find with what the real trigger is and what the lie is underneath, then you can get continue to get triggered.
So if you want to clear these these triggers at the root level, then you have to say, OK, what did I just tell myself after they said what they said? That made me feel sad or made me feel or believe I was being rejected. And so maybe that statement in between is like, oh, I’m not a good enough mom or I’m not a good enough employee or I’m not a good enough whatever. I’m not a good enough partner or it doesn’t matter what it is, but to find out what that line is is really important so you can see the lies that you’re telling yourself, because as long as you’re telling yourself the truth about who you are, you will never feel the state of loss of yourself.
Because the truth of who you are is at the very core of who you are. You are a divine being. And anything else that you tell yourself or anything else that your mind tells you or anything else that anybody else tells you, that is anything other than the truth, that you are a divine being, that you are love, that you are absolutely lovable just as you are. That means that there’s a life happening. And so it’s not just time for you to wake up from these lies, it’s time for us to all collectively wake up from these lies.
And when we each do our own work and begin to wake up from our own personal lives, then we can collectively wake up from the collective lives that we’re telling each other and also hold a feel for truth. When you hold the field for truth, then it’s when somebody tries to lie to themselves about themselves. You can you can be a witness. You can stand there and tell them the truth about who they are because you’re standing in truth yourself.
And you can be the remembrance. You can ask them questions that guide them back into the field of truth within themselves. And so we each have this opportunity. It’s interesting, last night I was really surprised I was going to bed a little bit later than I probably should have anyway. And I I had this flashback of of this employer that I used to work for when I was in my teens. I used to work in a dental office and it was a large dental office.
This was over 20 years ago. And I would manage I manage this office. I got the job when I was 16, and then by the time I was 17, 18, I was managing this huge dental office that I was getting paid less than anybody else. I was I was training people who were getting paid almost double what I was getting paid. And then we hired some kids to come in and do some work and they were getting paid more than I was getting paid.
And I was just, like, really hurt by this, but instead of me knowing how to go and speak what was going on for me and ask for a raise, I quit.
And I thought when I went to quit, my boss would want to know why I was quitting and then I would tell them, you know, stay and I’ll be more work like that, he he was like, you’re quitting.
And he was so hurt. I could tell how hard he was. He wasn’t it was angry because he was hurt. And I didn’t know how to deal with it at the time. And he’s like, just get out, just go. He felt like I was part of the family. I think that’s why he was so hurt. And he basically said, just take two, two weeks notice, just leave. And I’m like, don’t you want to know what he’s like?
Nope, just get out. He was so hurt. So anyway, last night I’m laying in bed and I’ve forgotten about this. And I had had this very strange conflict. It wasn’t super severe, but it was it was enough. There was something still that had had me thinking about this scenario and I’d forgotten about it for a long time. And so I started to do a prayer of forgiveness for this man between the two of us for any animal suffering that we caused each other.
And it was funny, I have done this forgiveness for many people, but I had never done it for him and so it was somehow it was getting triggered. And I wonder why now that this is happening, and I just had to trust that for whatever reason, I was awake at night thinking of this man and going, OK, just now is the time. I don’t know what’s going on with his life. But so I did this beautiful prayer, forgiveness and connection.
And I I envisioned myself going to him and being honest about my emotions and honest sharing with him what was really happening to me. And then his response to that and how I didn’t give him the opportunity to to respond in a compassionate way to me. I just assumed in a way that I couldn’t speak the truth. And so this is the other aspect of staying in power. You speak your truth, speak about what’s important, to speak about what your needs are from a place where you free the other person to not have to do anything.
But at minimum, for yourself to be able to speak up and say, hey, you know what, I’m feeling this way about this, I just want to check this out with you, especially if you tell yourself a story about somebody else, maybe you could say, you know, I don’t know why I’m feeling this way, but I’m feeling this way. And I’m having this thought and I really want to check it out with you. Let yourself be vulnerable to to check things out rather than maybe accusing somebody just because there is some sort of strange dynamic between you and if you’re feeling vulnerable, if you’re feeling disrespected, if you’re feeling undervalued.
I come up with a plan, a way of what you would like to say, but not in a way where you’re laying in bed thinking about rolling it over in your mind, keeping yourself awake at night, literally sit down with a piece of paper and write out the key points of what it is you want to cover. You can always take that with you and make sure that you have you stay on track. But what’s most important is when you go to another person.
Allowing yourself to feel vulnerable and if you even need to cry to allow yourself to cry, give yourself that space, because what happens is a lot of us have been trained that it’s not acceptable for us to cry even as adults when we’re feeling emotional. And and so if you happen to feel that emotion that may come up when you start to clamp down to kind of swallow it back, what happens is your throat goes into a contracted state and you come across sounding angry or stern, and the other person may really misinterpret what’s going on.
And so to be in a place where you just allow your vulnerability, if your vulnerability comes up where you’re feeling sad or you feel scared, you can even say and the more you voiced it, the less likely your body is going to kind of. Kind of go into kind of a state where it kind of starts to emote, and a part of the reason it does that is because. There is this lack of freedom within you, and so it’s like trying to help you break through in some way.
So if you can allow yourself to be honest about your needs, honest about what you are observing that’s going on and honest about how you’re feeling, even if it’s not fully accurate. And what I mean by that is sometimes people are like, oh, I feel like you hate me. But that’s not an actual feeling. I fear that you hate me is an actual feeling. Or I believe that you hate me. There’s a belief. And I think that you maybe because I noticed these things.
Is this true to giving people the freedom to to honor, to answer honestly with you? I have my son here, so he’s asked me if you can have a gold coin. All right, see you later, alligator. OK, so, yeah, so staying in the power of you, really, it starts to there’s a there’s a bunch of different things that can help you in the power of you. The other thing is meditation. Meditating on your own divinity is a really powerful technique and meditating even on the divinity of everyone in humanity, because your brothers and sisters around the world are all your.
Family. And all of them are equal in the eyes of the divine, the divine interests, equality to each of you, including your own equality, which means resting into a place where you understand that if you have an idea that somebody is better than you, that you are not allowing the truth of equality to permeate your consciousness. And so doing meditations where you meditate on on the equality of all of humanity, whether it’s somebody who’s living on the street or king or queen of England or a CEO of a corporation or.
A CEO of a small company or a mother or father or doesn’t matter, doesn’t matter what it is, a six month old for an 80 year old that that there is everyone is considered equal in the eyes of the divine.
And so if you can meditate on that when you approach people, then you can actually approach them from that place of truth where you understand and recognize that there is an even playing field. And if you’re telling yourself a story of something else, like, for example, be telling yourself that you feel less than somebody else or you think you’re better than someone else, that you can actually come into a place of remembrance of the truth, which is everyone is equal in the eyes of the divine.
Now, anyone who is listening to this and I can see a few people who are on Zoom right now, but I’m going to check and see. There’s a couple of people at least who are who are participating on on Facebook, but whoever is paying attention right now and whoever’s going to see this replay even afterwards, one of the things that I want to say to you is that I am very soon going to be publishing a book that I transcribed from The Divine, and it’s going to be coming up within the next week or so, depending on what the divine suggests for me to release it.
So if you haven’t already signed up for my newsletters, please go to Toribiong Gay.com and sign up for my newsletter and then you’ll be notified when this book gets released. It’s it’s all been written. It’s all been formatted. I’m just waiting on a design and divine timing for this. And so as that happens, then I will release it to to the world. And so now what I’m going to do is I’m just going to allow for anyone to ask any questions, whether it’s on Doom or on Facebook live.
And if any if no one has questions, then I’ll just keep talking. But if anybody has questions, please just mute yourself or type in a question in the chat. So what I’ll do is I’ll just keep talking right now, and until someone has a question, if there’s no questions, it’s totally fine. I’ll just do some talking because I can talk about staying in power, how to stay in power in many different ways. So.
The other thing about staying in your power, is it basically staying in power from you to do so, not just in relationship to other people, but how you are within yourself? And what I mean by this is when you find yourself. Losing yourself in ideas that are negative about yourself or even losing yourself, losing yourself, if you start to have judgment and negativity towards somebody else, that’s when you you go out of your power.
And so if you if you go into those states where you notice negativity arise about yourself. And you attach to that idea, then you fall out of alignment. Now here’s a fascinating thing. Thank you. OK, I’ll answer that in a moment. OK, so when you fall out of alignment or out of the power of you, I’m going to tell you a secret.
When you do that, you are actually falling out of mentorship with your divinity and you’re falling out of mentorship with the Divine. And so one of the things that you can do when it’s whether it’s interacting with someone else or just your own thoughts about yourself is to surrender to the divine. It’s a very fast track and surrender any type of negative thought, any judgment about somebody else or judgment about yourself. And you literally imagine you surrendering that at the feet of the divine and at the same time you go into remembrance of their divinity, which means you enter back into mentorship with your dignity.
For some people, this can be kind of like a little bit of a confused idea of how to do that or what that is if they’ve never really experienced their divinity. But first and foremost, if you can imagine yourself to be a divine child of God, that was who was purposefully made who is absolutely adored and loaned 24/7 and that all of creation has been created for you to be able to come into the knowing the mystery of who you are for that that revelation to be revealed to you.
That’s a starting point. But if that’s a bit challenging and if it’s too much for you as a starting point, then you can go into mentorship with love. Because God is the divine is love, but for a lot of people, it’s a far better place to begin. Now, I’m not talking about romantic love. I’m not talking about falling in love, that type of love. I’m talking about unconditional love. And so you can go into if ever you start to have negative thoughts about yourself, if you can actually surrender, then to unconditional love and you can ask love itself to mentor you and you can say love what what what should I do with this this negative thought in helping or better yet, here, just take this negative thought, unconditional love for love.
What should I feel right now? What should I feel about myself? What it should I believe about myself? Love will always tell you the truth. If it’s anything negative, it’s just your mind lying to you. If it’s anything beautiful and positive and telling you love is guiding. And so you want to stay in that field of love, stay in the field of truth. Now, if you believe negative things about yourself. You need to check sometimes, check out what those things are.
For example, if you think that you’re not good enough as an employee, then instead of labeling yourself as not good enough, then take a look and see whether or not you their skills that you need to to learn. And if it’s simple is all, I need to take a course to take a course so you can always elevate yourself with skills and shift and change things. If it’s about you being not skilled, let’s say if you feel not adequate as a mother or a father, you can take parenting courses that beautiful online peaceful parenting courses.
You can read books. There’s lots of different things you can do. And so what’s really important is coming into it. Also, the idea of being what’s called an optimist. I’m not talking about being an optimist where you just think positive things, but coming into an optimist mindset where you understand if there’s something that’s deficient about my skills or knowledge, then I just need to learn. And who do I need to talk to? What do I need to read?
What do I need to do to improve skills? Sometimes I can take care of a lot of different things. However, if at the very deep root there is a belief that you’re not good enough in general as a human being, and not that maybe you have a belief that you’re not good enough for love or even to even exist to see a lot of people who come to me for counseling. If you you hold those beliefs, those are really deep-Seated traumas that need to be resolved at a level and coming to a place where when you surrender to the divine, if you’re going to do your own work, you surrender all of that to the divine, all of the pain and trauma of the belief that you’re not good enough and then allow and ask the divine show me guide me to see my value in existence.
How is it that I shall be my quality revealed to me my quality, and if there are still quite painful places within you, then go and have a session with someone who knows how to go to the root of an issue to clear it for you, to help you clear it so that you can resolve that you can move forward and you can go to that RTT or a rapid transformational therapy is a really good technique to to see. But there’s lots of other modalities out there that can be really helpful if you can identify who they are and maybe get referred by people who have had help.
I offer our sessions as well as other transformational work, but it’s something that is is very possible for you to do on your own if you do know how to navigate to those places. And the most important thing you can do when you go to those places where you’re where you have hurt and you identify like, for example, this scenario where I was working with this employer once I was able to to enter into a scene. Then from there I can do a resolution within it.
I can tell my self the truth in it, and I can mentor myself to interact in a way that is more helpful. And the best thing you can do if you do have parts of you that felt a lot of trauma as a child, if you go back to those scenes, if you can remember those scenes, you can go back. The most important thing you can do is mentor that young you with the wisdom you have now. They would not have had that wisdom.
They wouldn’t have had the bigger picture. But if you can take that child into your arms and lovingly, lovingly tell them the truth about what’s going on. And the truth is almost always, if it has to do with their parents, mum and dad did the best they could. They didn’t know what they didn’t know. They didn’t know how to be emotionally available or they were emotionally disabled. They were lost in the mentorship they received from their parents.
That was not very good. And so they didn’t really know how to be a good parent. But I’m here to tell you that their behavior has nothing to do with you, has everything to do with the pain and suffering that they’re feeling inside. And I know you told yourself it was your fault or I know you told yourself there was something wrong with you. There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re absolutely acceptable. And so to tell these younger versions of yourself, these these things and to hug them, hold them and integrate them back into your heart center is an incredibly powerful work.
And it’s work that you can do if you have access to these memories. Sometimes people don’t have access to these memories, so they need to hire someone to help them or they feel more comfortable being guided once they get to a place for someone who knows really how to resolve and mentor that child. And so. It’s really important that you address whatever you need to address that may have you feeling judgemental about yourself, but do what you can to surrender those judgments over to the divine.
You can be disciplined in that way. You can use it as a spiritual practice just to keep surrendering the negativity over and ask the divine to illuminate the places that need to be healed and then to bring in healing, love, beautiful mercy into those places that are feeling really hurt and lost, abandoned, rejected. And and whatever else that got to these parts of us sometimes end up getting fractured off and they can feel and get lost in.
And really the truth is, is that those those same states that part of you has the lost into everybody. Almost everybody in the world is lost in those states at times. And that’s what those trigger places are when they get triggered or even if somebody walks around on a day to day basis with negativity and everything else, you have to understand there’s something really deep that’s been hurting within them that needs to be transformed. And the best thing you can do is just be present, not to take anything personally, just like the Divine said, and that in that one chapter or one paragraph that I read.
The Divine is inviting you to stay in your power and to not make a story up about that person’s anger. They’ve already made a story. You don’t need to make another story. That’s that’s why we get stuck in these places of craziness within our society as a people are just making story upon story. That’s not even true. And they’re hurting themselves with those stories. And so being in a place where you recognize that it’s it’s absolutely safe and normal for you to be in a place of feeling empowered and to not have to be reactive in a place of peace within yourself to start to cultivate that and practice that.
And before you know it, if you show your mind that you choose to be in the state of presence and peace, unconditional love, the compassionate wisdom, unconditional love is compassion, wisdom. To get in that state of consciousness, you have to be wise. You have to be wise to the fact that that people are suffering everywhere. And to understand that this is heavy ancestral patterning that’s been going on from generation to generation, we’re given the opportunity to shift and change it.
What happens is some of us go about our parents or people even present present life interactions, they’re like, well, they should be able to not be like this. They should be able to be peaceful. They should be able to do whatever. And I always say to people, if that’s true, if they should be able to do it, then you should do so. Practice it first. Be that embodiment of a person who can maintain peace no matter what’s going on.
And then from there, once you maintain peace from there, you probably won’t have those kinds of judgments. I know for me, when I interact with people who are lost, the last thing I’m thinking about is they should be able to be in a place of peace right now. Even if I’m in a place of peace. I know what it took for me to get to that place of peace over it over time. And it was a lot of practice.
I had to face my own stuff. And so when you go through the process and you and your you’re practicing and you’re embodying being in a peaceful place, you have great compassion for people because it’s to get to a place where you’re free of the influence of other people and you’re free of the influence of your own mind. It’s you’ve done your work and you know how challenging that can be. You have compassion for people who are suffering, especially those who’ve been through way more than you’ve been through.
Now, I’m not saying that you haven’t been through a lot.
Just saying there’s like people across the spectrum of what they’ve experienced and so to have compassion, I know people who have been through things, you cannot even conceive of it come out the other side and people who have not experienced very much and come out the other side. And so I’ve seen people free themselves from any circumstance that’s present on the face of this or any circumstance. I’m telling you to work with some really dark situations for clients that they’ve been through.
And so if they can do it, then you can do it. And as someone who has had mild circumstances can do it, you can do it. If I can do it, that I know you can do it. And I say this because I’ve been through the spectrum. I’ve experienced incredible amount of dark situations growing up, a lot of trauma, a lot of situations. I think the divine you have to meet with those circumstances so I can have greater compassion for people in their states, but also to have been mentored by the divine to come out of those stuck states.
Then I can then, of course, teach people to come out of those states would be different if I was born into a situation where everything was perfect. And then I’m like, hey guys, just being in stillness, be in peace. And so because I’ve gone through the gamut of emotional conflict from like suicidal ideation, high anxiety, depression, fear, PTSD, crazy, crazy things, lots of different types of abuse, physical, sexual, emotional and energetic abuse, as well as spiritual trauma.
So I’ve been through a whole bunch of different things. And so it gives me a lot of compassion. You can always and this is a blessing as you practice and embody peace and clear your emotional conflicts and clear your ancestral programming as well as your societal programming. What happens is you really, truly do have compassion for people. You really start to see how challenging it can be for people to come out of suffering. And then you’ll be of service in whatever way you can, whether it’s walking into a grocery store.
Calling a friend who is alone during this time. It doesn’t matter what it is and being an unconditional witness to whatever whatever is going on in them. So I’m going to check check for questions, I know that Tom has a question here. Hi, Tara. How do you take. How do you take a room with you? When you are facing a situation or person in that room. Don, can you just clarify what you mean by take room with you?
And as you’re typing that, I’m just going to check and say, can you hear me OK? Yeah. Oh, hey, hey, let’s see. By the way, when you talk to the first exercise, you were offering, the beginning of the talk when you said, yeah, when you face violence, maybe a violent person was not quite right for the right to take the room with me.
And I’m like, how do I take the room with me? Yeah.
So it’s not so much about taking the room with you. It’s about you taking in the room and with your eye. It’s like visually seeing everything. And so, like, if you’re if you’re in the grocery store, you’re looking let’s say you’re having an interaction with the cashier. You’re looking at your eyes are resting on the cashier, but you’re taking the whole room and meeting. You’re seeing as much as you can at least one hundred and eighty degrees of the room.
And so, like, right now I’m looking at the screen, but I’m seeing like the ends of the room. I’m seeing everything that fills in that space. When I’m in that state, I’m in a state of prisons. It’s open eyed awareness from that place. Again, I am awareness and as I am awareness, my my mind is rested.
There’s no thinking going on.
And so you could even practice this right now as you’re looking at the screen of me, take in the room that you’re in and what can happen is for me, what happens is my crown starts to open up. I actually start to feel this openness here and this openness here. And then I am actually pure, pure, awakened, open awareness. And I am the room now that’s kind of a kind of a challenging thing to say to somebody like I am the room.
But everything that exists within the room is exists within me. It doesn’t exist somewhere else. This is getting into a very deep spiritual teaching, but none of this makes sense.
And so whatever sounds I hear. I can hear my fridge right now kind of buzzing. There’s some kids that were outside so I can hear them and my son’s turning pages. And so even though I’m aware of all the sounds. And that they’re like over here, it seems like they’re here, over here and I’m aware of all of the items as well as the space between me and the camera.
All of that is within me. And when we get kind of fixated on an idea where there’s some sort of wrongness or judgment, the mind actually can’t perceive this peripheral vision, it’s actually in a weird, focused point. And if you can open up your gaze and open up your ears where you can have a conversation with someone, you could be hearing them. As I’m talking, I can hear everything. And from that place then, I’m not even thinking about what I’m saying, it’s just coming through me.
So in the same way, you can listen in that way, where someone is speaking to their words or moving through you, they are within you, literally are within you. And from that place, when you are in a place of open awareness and you’re neutral.
My son’s crawling underneath the table when you’re in this place of neutrality because everything’s in you and you’re neutral as you take in their words, even if they’re angry words, you have to protect yourself from them. It’s all in you anyway. And the lack of protection, the lack of the need for protection, because you’re in this really peaceful place like you are actually bringing in. I don’t know what they bring in because it’s not even that you are in awareness and in that aware state.
The sweetheart shut the door, please. When you’re not aware where state what’s happening is that you are neutralizing anything that that that seemingly comes at. So I had last week, I had a woman on here who was asking me questions, she was like, how do you protect yourself from somebody who’s fearful or how do you protect yourself from someone who’s negative? And I said. You you don’t have to protect yourself. You go out into the world and somebody is wearing a mask and gloves and you fear them.
I say say to someone, I think it was yesterday, I was like, if they’re if they have gloves on and a mask on, you’re more protected, first of all, from them.
So there’s nothing to fear. But if you were aware of their fear stage and you think you need to protect yourself from their fear state, then then you are now. Then you are the one that’s carrying the fear. If you’re in a place where you’re in your presence, there’s nothing you need to protect yourself from in that situation. You it’s it’s it’s like water off a duck’s back. It just moves through you and you’re so neutral or nothing sticks, you’re just a field of awareness.
And a great example of this is if the sky. You know, is the field of awareness in the clouds or thoughts or beliefs? That clouds don’t impress upon the sky, the clouds don’t stay in the sky, the sky, the clouds are not permanent, they come and go, the sky is never tainted, never painted, never touched, never stained. Why those clouds? And so to believe that those things affect you is to fall into the trap that that other person is already in.
So therefore, if your state somehow is infected, you. But but not they didn’t do it, you did it. You believed a lie about the situation. So waking up from a lie is this is an important part of being in that place, staying in the power of you, waking up from all lies. You have a belief that you were lost because of an interaction with someone else. You were the one that’s not there, not doing anything.
And someone like Nelson Mandela is a really great example of this. He went to prison. A lot of people went to prison during that same time. He was one of very few people who came out in those circumstances in South Africa, where he was free before they actually physically freed him. His mind was freed, before they physically freed him. And he he didn’t hold the belief of his own imprisonment. And when he came out, he was people were like really deeply affected by his level of freedom and he had no animosity, didn’t have any sense of of let’s punish these people or anything else like that.
He was really free.
He wasn’t marred by it. And so your status of consciousness has a lot to do with. With your choice and waking up from fomites. And so, if anything, that that I’ve offered all of you today is is the if you feel lost, if you feel abused, if you feel fearful of others, where you feel like some like somehow people or people affect you in some way, then you really need to begin this beautiful process. And it is an invitation to wake up to the beauty of you, the power of you, the freedom.
You know, as you move into the freedom of you, then you share freedom with other people. Truly freedom. When you choose freedom for yourself, you then you begin the process of walking into life, freeing other people and in that process. The whole of existence changes. You’re now affecting the field in an incredibly beautiful way, where you’re actually the living walking change that I know all of you want to see in the world. And and from that place, you are a gift, a gift anyway.
Let me just tell you let me just catch you up on a secret. You are a gift.
Your beautiful blessing. It’s already done. You’re already enlightened. I’m just reminding you. I’m reminding you of some of the steps, some of the minds that some of the tools to be able to awaken to the truth about who you are.
And the truth is, is everyone it doesn’t matter who they are, I faced people lots of times who have who have accused me or who have thought a lot of different negative things about me. And I love them anyway. And I don’t find it wrong. I know their stuff because of hurt and pain with themselves and.
My my prayer, my intention, my existence is truly to remind them of their duty and their freedom and their dignity. And so if if they falsely think something else is going on. I know that they’re lying to themselves and I have compassion for them. And I do whatever I can to reveal to them the truth that I love them and that’s all I can do. And and so if somebody makes you tries to make you wrong, if somebody tries to accuse you of things, B, in the truth of you.
So that you can share that truth with them, not just about you. So that you can share the truth about them to. You know that they’re not wrong. We just think there are. That there they may think they’re not good enough, but that’s because it’s just a thought. There’s no reality in the world.
The only thing that’s true is, is their dignity. Everything else is illusion. It’s not true at all. But we have these interactions with people and we’re playing. Right. We’re playing so well here. The game I’m inviting you to play is the Game of Awakening. It’s the game of freedom. The game of truth. Any any other questions from anyone? A Roger. And you. Do you have any comments or questions? Roger? OK, now can you hear me?
You can hear me OK? So this might take a minute or so, but it is around power and staying in one’s power. So a few days ago, I was in a workshop on Zoome and we were put to breakout rooms, they call it. So it was one on one breakout rooms. And we’re supposed to work with another person to find. Our deepest longing. So I went to the breakout room and the person that was there was just text, so there was no person there.
It was just somebody who had logged on and had left. And so I was like I sat there for a few minutes trying to talk to this person and I felt something coming up in me. But so then I left the room, went back to the home, and then I tried to get another partner, but that didn’t work. And then she came when everybody came back in and. She says, OK, now it’s time to switch partners and we’ll we’ll just all go into rooms with other people, other random people.
So it’s like, OK, so we go into rooms of supposedly other random people. But I ended up in the same room with the same nobody. And I got only triggered. I was like I was like I was like angry. I was upset and I was so I had to sit back. I was like, what’s really going on? Like, what’s happening with me? So I sat into it. You know, into the emotion of it and the emotion that was coming up was, well, one was rejection and the other one was abandonment, which I you know, I think they’re both related.
And it’s something I’ve worked on before and something I’ve allowed myself unconditional love for.
And it totally caught me off guard. And so I guess my question is, how can I avoid that from happening? How can I actually truly, fully process that that old wound and move on so that it’s not, you know, weaving in and out of my life unconsciously?
Right. It’s a really good question, because these things we can see, they can get triggered even in a circumstance where it’s like it’s not actually a person who’s rejecting you. Right. There’s no other person who is just outward saying, hey, there’s something wrong with you or something. It’s just in one circumstance, kind of a computer glitch. In another circumstance, it’s somebody who’s left the whole environment altogether. And so we can it’s it’s nice when you can see that there is the fear of rejection or the idea of rejection is is not true and it can’t even be true.
But yet you feel it. So we can’t stop ourselves from feeling it if the unresolved conflict is there. One of the things we can do is we can be grateful, go, oh, this is the opportunity for me to see what this is. And so from that circumstance, right in the moment, if you can do the work, because it’s so in the future, you can certainly do it, but you can actually go back and your mind will reveal to you most times what what it was specifically that you were thinking.
And so even right now, Roger, what was it in the when you first notice yourself go into reaction? What was the what was the belief that you had about the circumstances in that moment about you specifically? Well, in that moment, I don’t think it was all unconscious. I don’t believe I was actually in a thought because I knew. That this had nothing to do with any other person besides me, and it was all my responsibility, it was all myself causing the conflict within me.
But I didn’t really have any. Any thoughts going on, like limiting thoughts or or, you know. And self sabotaging talk or anything happening, if that’s what you’re asking.
Yes, and so this is this is where it kind of gets a little tricky because the mind will actually like it truly will be unconscious. The mind will try and hide it. And so the sooner you can do the work better. And if you can understand that there absolutely is something you’re saying your mind is saying to you, because it’s the. The idea of rejection. It doesn’t come up for from just anywhere there is something that’s already there. And so what you could if you can go into a place of of going as close to the circumstance and as close to the response emotionally that you received and if it’s a belief that you’re being rejected.
Well, that’s that’s a belief. It’s not even a feeling. But you may feel something come up. So if you’re like I’m I’m feeling rejected. It’s not a feeling. It’s a belief. So that’s the belief right there. And one of the questions you can ask is. I’m feeling rejected because they’re not even asked the question, but finish the statement. I’m feeling rejected right now because and then answer or finish the rest of that sentence.
Well, if I finish the rest of the sentence, I could do that right now. And I could say I was feeling rejected because I still have an old wound about my one of my parents that abandon me, abandoning me. And so and so this automatically shows you already know what it is, somebody else might not right away know what to do. So if it is your parents abandoning, then you could go to an actual scene or an amalgamation of scenes.
So it could be something like this. I might ask you or you might ask yourself, what was the first time I felt this abandonment or rejection? And if you could go to the very first memory, something that happened, that transpired for you, then you have a starting point. Or if you even ask, when was the most potent memory of abandonment or rejection? And so for you, if you’re willing to do this work right now, I’ll do it in front of everybody so people kind of have an idea of what this would look like.
Is that something you’re willing to do? No pressure. You don’t have to do. You have to publicly do this work. You know what? I’m doing a workshop tonight myself, which is going to be very public anyway. So this is good practice.
OK, great. So what’s the the first or the most potent memory you remember of your parents rejecting you?
Well, I mean, that’s I mean, you said because you said that I was it made me wonder if the memory that I do have is indeed actually the first memory of the. And the first memory, like the one that feels the strongest, is being kicked out of my house at 13 by my mom, who took me to a bus and sent me off to another, you know, my grandparents. And I mean, I remember. How I felt for many, many hours around that for many days, actually, even a month, I felt like I was having a hard time accepting it.
And so in this experience, when you were when you were feeling this energy, you were and you were kicked out, what’s the first thing when your parents did? What’s the first emotion that you felt? I you know, I felt betrayed, right? Yeah, I felt betrayed.
And so I’m going to I’m going to say a sentence and I want you to repeat it and then finish it. I felt betrayed because. I felt betrayed because the reason I was kicked out was not something that I entirely played a role in. OK, and so you were being accused of something that wasn’t fully your fault, is that why I can take personally responsibility but not the whole responsibility?
And so did you feel that there was a sense of injustice as well? Yes, OK, because this is it’s really important to kind of get a sense of, you know, all of the beliefs and the emotions that were involved. And so for your parents to to kind of blame you in this way and then to kick you out as a response, how did you feel emotionally that there was this injustice and betrayal that occurred around something that you perceive shouldn’t have that big of a response?
Like how did you feel emotionally? Well, horribly, I mean, emotions were all over the place. I mean, I was sad, I was devastated. I was. Yeah, it was just like my whole body was falling apart for a while.
And in what ways was your body falling apart? My heart was just broken. I think my whole sense of security and. Support was broken, the trust. King. And so in this experience, what what else did you believe about your parents sending you off? What did you know, they just didn’t care, you know? And how did how did how do you feel was the predominant feeling state that you felt with the belief that they didn’t care?
Well, I don’t know. Did you say a police statement? Yeah, what is it that you believed about you? When you when you had the belief that they didn’t care what they believe, first of all, was the emotion, predominant emotion that you felt about them not caring, like how did you how did that make you feel to believe they didn’t care about you?
Oh, totally unworthy. Yes. And how did it feel for you to believe that you were unworthy in some way? So you broke up, sorry, you broke up.
Oh, how did it make you feel to. How did it make you feel to believe that you were unworthy of their care? Alone area alone. And so when you were sent away then and you were sent home on the bus, what is it that you noticed energetically about about about yourself when you were on the bus? What do you if you were to look at yourself as that child, 13 years old, on the bus, if you were to just pictured what was going on for him, what do you notice about his energy, his body energy and his state?
You know, there was I would say his energy was needed and was. Yeah, I just felt like it was needed at that time. And what do you notice of it? Was there something else? No, go ahead. What did you notice about his body positions and. When he’s on that bus, what do you notice energetically happening with his body? Definitely trying to hide it, like turning down and trying to hide the emotion, not wanting to be embarrassed or caught or seen by anybody.
OK, this is this is really important. This is actually I’m being told that this is one of the most important things about how you when you go into these energies, how you go into a type of hiding. So this is really key. There’s a couple of key things in here. I’m just going to keep asking because there’s some more I can already tell there, some more. So when you went into that place of believing that you were unworthy and feeling deep aloneness, how did how did you perceive existence in general?
Like how do you perceive your place in the world? Well, I didn’t feel there was a place right, great. And what is it that you needed the most from your parents instead of them sending kicking you out and sending you off? What did you need the most?
Well, I knew what I needed at that time was unconditional love and some support or, you know, communication. I needed some open communication so that they could hear how I was feeling in the chain. OK. OK, and is there anything else in this circumstance when you were 13 years old, when you were kicked out, you were sent away on a bus, is there anything else in that circumstance that you felt emotionally? You said it was a whole bunch of things.
So you felt sad, devastated. We felt betrayed, abandoned. We felt alone and unworthy. You had a sense of displacement. You had a belief that they didn’t care about you. You felt your heart contracting and you had a sense of a broken heart and a lack of trust or a broken, broken trust.
Is there anything else that you were feeling? And believing at the time you were also wanting to hide your state or not reveal what was happening to other people, you know, on the other side, I was also feeling opportunity and I was feeling.
There was some freedom I was feeling. About being able to explore on my own. In a way. And there I was feeling also feeling potential, right? And what else? So so that’s good that those those things were there and that’s probably what kept you in a place of not full collapse, right.
So it’s pretty devastating to be sent away at that age is a key time in one’s life. Did you feel confused by your parents, by this kind of injustice as well? Was there confusion in your mind about.
Oh, totally. I have no idea why I even remember asking my mom.
Why write? OK, so just to let everybody who’s listening know that whenever there’s confusion in a child or a teen or even an adult, really, that’s where the grounds for an emotional conflict can take root.
Because when there’s a question of why, what happens is if the parent doesn’t actually communicate and have a basically have an effective communication that’s loving and unconditional, like you need it, what happens is that the mind starts to fill in the blanks. It starts to go well, they don’t care about me. And when where they have no place, I can’t trust anyone.
I have to hide this from other people because I’ll ask you this next part. Why did you believe you needed to not reveal this or show your your vulnerable state to other people with the belief that there is the reason you had to hide, not allowed to see? What was the reason I had to hide and not be seen? What did you believe back then was the reason you had to hide this and other people? What’s the worst thing that could happen if you revealed that you were in this vulnerable place?
I to be laughed at or whatever or teased or something. And what’s the worst thing that could happen if you were laughed at or teased? I would spiral even further into whatever I was in. And is there anything else that you believed about yourself in this whole circumstance? I don’t think anything that’s that’s relevant to the story that was playing out OK.
So this is what I’m going to get you to do. I’m going to get you to close your eyes. And as you close your eyes, I want you to think of that young you. And I want you to go to. The scene where your parents are angry with you. And I want you to see that 13 year old, you being told that he’s being kicked out. And where are you in that scene? Is it like in a kitchen or where are you being told?
So. I actually don’t even remember the exact moment when I was told, OK, I remember the bit before that where there was a conversation about the event.
And a judgment. But. I don’t remember the exact moment, though, the actual decision, and I was told what was happening.
OK, so where would you would your parents normally have these kinds of discussions with you? Well, actually, wait a second, because. So here’s OK. Remember that now. So I was told I could make the decision whether to stay or to go and then but I was told if I was going to stay there, that I would basically. The under martial law, bla bla bla, bla, bla, and so actually it was me that chose to leave out of fear of.
Out of fear of martial law. Have basically. OK, but then that choice that you were given, you felt was unfair in some way. Felton was a what did you. You were given the choice of martial law or get out, right? Did you feel that was fair? No, I think either one was. And so you took the path of least paying for yourself in some way. Yes.
And that’s probably why you there is probably part of you that went that’s that’s the part of me that went, oh, this is the opportunity. There’s potential. There’s freedom where I know if I stay here, what I’m going to get. OK, even though I knew and decided that I wanted to stay. Yes, OK. And you wanted to stay because why? I wanted to stay because. And just finish that statement, I wanted to stay because.
I want to stay because that was home, I was you know, that was my family, that was I would just it just felt it felt good.
OK. All right, so. Let’s go let’s just meet your parents and this young you at the kitchen table or dinner table or wherever it is that might gather with them. And and just imagine that you’re you’ve been given this choice already.
And. If you were to make a choice today, what do you think you would do with all the wisdom that you have in the growth and the journey that you have? What would you choose to do?
Do you think probably choose a center, right? And so from this place, can you can you feel, can you? Feel the to the fear of them not caring about you in the unworthiness that might be there in that young 13 year old you. But can you show up and how old are you right now? What’s your current age? Forty nine. Can you show up as the forty nine year old you in this room with them? And can you see yourself sitting in the room and imagine yourself?
They know who you are and why you’re there and and they’re all happy you’re there because you hold the field that this greater wisdom. And so in that place. Can you speak into the room and and say to this 13 year old, you I know that you’re you’re choosing to leave out of fear of martial law.
Can you excuse me, can you speak out loud to him? I know you are leaving because you’re afraid of martial law. And I know at the same time, a part of me wants to stay. I don’t know, at the same time, a part of you want to stay. And can you say to your parents, I didn’t really have a way to peacefully tell you this before, but I feel like my options, the options you’ve given me are unfair.
Yeah, on. Dear parents, I feel your parenting structure is unfair and. And the options you’ve given me are not fair, and the options you’ve given me are are not adequate. And I really wish that we could have had a better discussion about this. And just say that to them, I wish we could have had a better discussion about this. And I really wish we would have had a better discussion about all of this. What I really needed, what I really need as your son, is to at least feel heard.
This just a little bit of breaking up, but did you hear what I said? No. OK. There’s some breaking up of the of the video. So what I really needed was, at minimum, what I really needed was to be heard from by you.
At very minimum, what I really needed was to be heard by you. And for you to give me lovingly give me the space to speak about what was going on and for you to lovingly give me the space. To express what was going on. And can you say to your parents, I take responsibility for my part in what happened? And I take total responsibility for. Myself in the events that happened. And it would it would be nice if there were.
Opportunities for me to learn about this and also be able to stay in a peaceful way. And it would be great for me to have opportunity to learn from this and stay in a peaceful way. And so turn to the 13 year old you and and just say to this 13 year old, you.
Is there anything else that you need from mom and dad? Is there anything else you need from mom and dad? And what does he say to you? He says, yes, so what does he need? He just wanted unconditional love and support. So walk over to him and just reach your hand out to take him by the hand and have him stand up beside you and just put your arms around him and give him a hug. And as you’re hugging him, just say to him, I’m here for you.
I just say that it was like, imagine yourself doing that and then just saying to him, I’m here for you and just allowing him to rest into, you know, Roger, I’m here for you.
And just allow yourself allow him to rest into you and as he’s resting into how is he feeling knowing that you’re you’re there to support him, even though he’s going through this very challenging, very emotional, very disconnecting almost such a thing like how is your presence there holding him and and helping with communication and expression of his needs? How does that make him feel that you’re there supporting him? He feels very supported and relieved. And feels very held emotionally know.
So look him in the eyes and just say to him, I know this, all of this has been very confusing for you. I know all of this has been very confusing for you and you haven’t understood what’s happening. And I understand what’s happening and you haven’t understood what’s been happening. And you haven’t understood what’s been happening, and I know you think that mom and dad have done this because we don’t care about you, and I know that is like mom and dad do this because they don’t love you.
But they do what they do. They are they think that this is tell me if this is true, Roger, I think it really is. They did this to help you. Now, it’s true they did this because they thought it would help you. And so this is the way they think is best to let you. So this is the way they think is best for you. And even though they’re wrong. And even if they’re wrong, it doesn’t it doesn’t mean that they don’t love you.
It doesn’t mean that they don’t love you. It’s just that this is the only way they know how to take care of the situation, and it’s just that this is the only way they know how to take care of the situation because of the way they were mentored when they were kids.
So that, again, because of the way they were mentored when they were kids or not, because of the way they were mentored or raised when they were children and so.
They made their choices, thinking they were doing the best thing for you because they loved you, so they made their choices, doing what they thought was the best for you because they loved you and looking him in the eyes.
How does he feel knowing this about his parents? He feels relieved. We still feels like his husband is kind of set out alone, right?
So but it doesn’t seem to be any harsh effects of being alone, right?
So now what I want you to say to him and your parents, you have to understand your parents are witnessing this. They’re actually being mentored by you talking to him. So I want you to say to him in front of them, you actually never have to be alone again. You never actually have to be alone again because I’m I’m here for you from now on. Because I’m here for you from know and I know part of being kicked out, left you feeling disconnected and alone.
Sorry, and I know you having to go left, you felt left, you feeling disconnected, and I know that you having to go left, you feeling disconnected and alone, but you actually don’t have to do this alone, but you don’t actually have to do this alone because I’m here for you, because I’m here for you. And I will always be here and I’ll always be here for you.
And how does it feel knowing that you were there? To always be there with them. That feel for him knowing that he feels excited.
And so give him another great big hug. And as you’re hugging him, say to him, I choose to share my life with you. She used to share my life with you. And. I want you to imagine you inviting him into your heart center and merging came within your heart center and from that place when he’s there, I want you to say to him, I carried you everywhere with me through you.
Everywhere with me. Every choice I make in life and everything I do that nourishes me, I do it for us.
Every choice I make and lives and everything I do that.
To nurse me to do it for us every adventure I choose, I do it for us, every adventure I choose, I do it for us, every opportunity I open to, I do it for us, every opportunity I open to do it for us.
Every time I remember. Unconditional love and love and communication, I do it for us every time I remember unconditional love and open communication, I do it for. And every time I listen to my own needs, I do it for us. And every time I listen to my own needs, I do it for us and I want you to feel that joy and that excitement and that freedom that he feels inside of you. And then just say to him.
If ever you need anything, you let me know and I will listen, if ever you need anything, just let me know. I will listen. And then turn to your parents who are still in, they’re kind of there in that room and they’re witnessing this and just say to you both, your parents just say to them, just kind of being a kind of a triangle where you you’re across from both of them and say to them. You know, I know you did the best that you could.
I know you did the best you could.
And you didn’t really know how to handle intense situations and you didn’t really know how to handle intense situations like this.
And from that place, even though I know you’ve made mistakes. And from that place, even though I know you’ve made mistakes, I can free myself from the mistakes you’ve made. I can free myself from the mistakes you’ve made. And I know your mistakes have nothing to do with me personally, and I know your mistakes have nothing to do with me personally.
And even though you’ve made mistakes, we all make mistakes. I missed part of that. I said, even though you made mistakes, we all make mistakes. So even though we made mistakes. I know we all make mistakes. And so are are you willing to to free your parents from their their mistakes that they’ve made, are you willing to free them from from this somehow being energetically tied in with you being stuck in some way? Are you willing to like freedom and free yourself from.
You know, I think I’m pretty, you know, I’ve let go of my parents long term going that way, at least that’s what I thought. And so it’s it’s it’s. Yeah. OK, so then go up to to your your dad first and just give your dad a great big hug and say to your dad, you know, I, I, I it’s funny I was about to speak for you because I can feel what that longing is but to share with him.
What is your greatest longing in relationship to him. You know, the greatest longing is just being it’s not a request for anything, it’s just being. So just let yourself be with him, just give him a great big hug and allow the two of you just to be in the stillness, the present moment awareness together with nothing that you guys need to do. And in that place of stillness, how does he feel? He feels content and proud.
So from that place of a very important place of content and proud, because this is counter to what was really going on within him, then take him in through your heart center, making one with you. That part of you that’s so important and merged and within your heart center if you’re willing to. And that part of him or not even the part of him, but the embodiment of him feeling content and proud to allow it to resonate through your whole beingness.
And simply say thank you. Thank you. And then turn to your mother and. And look her in the eyes, just take her by the hands first and look her in the eyes and what is it that you that you would like to share with her? That’s the most important for the two of you to connect. Ms. It feels like I just want to say it’s OK. You don’t have to worry about me. So say that to him, say you don’t have to worry about me.
Yeah, it’s OK, you don’t have to worry about me at all, I I’m excited about my adventure and I’m excited about my adventure. And I want you to think about your mom, this is important because your mom had very much adventure. And. I don’t think a lot, no. So how would you feel about inviting her into the adventure side of your life, the the exploration way? Because I have a sense your mom was probably one of those people who had such limitations placed around her, and she.
She probably was energetically the way our sensor is, that there was a conservativeness about her, like I’m not I don’t mean politically, I mean like her energy was contained. And so. I think one of the things that you probably represented was energetically more a sense of freedom and exploration that was for her was just not permitted. And and she was so familiar with that type of containment. And so if you’re willing to invite her into the adventure of your life and the exploration of your life, then then invite her.
You know. I’d like to invite you to enjoy my adventures.
Yeah, and so is she willing, if that’s something that she would like to do, is that if you’re going to come with me, you have to be on your show?
What did she say? She just said yes, seven hour time ago, though. So just say to her it’ll be so much fun.
It will be a lot of fun and sometimes it will be challenging, but will be OK. Now, most of the time is going to be challenging. All right. And so give her a great big hug.
And first and foremost, just love her unconditionally before you take her into your heart center. Just hold her in the field of unconditional love. Which probably is the first time that she’s ever really experienced unconditional. And so in the field of unconditional love, when you you’re holding her in that place where she can really rest into you. Then simply say to her, I take you, I choose to take you into my heart center and then take her into your heart center and choose to take you into my heart center.
And feel that sense of curiosity within her for this adventure and exploration and the freedom to be on this journey with you and to be mentored by you because she doesn’t know much about it. And so. From that place, I want you to to have a sense of both your parents and this young version of you, the 13 year old, you and from this place, I want you to say I carry you and you’re talking to all three of them, but I carry you everywhere with.
Not sure if you heard that, but I can just say to all three of them, I see you everywhere with me. We carry you everywhere with me every time I step into the adventure of life, I do it with you. Every time I step into the adventure of life, I do it with all of you. Every time I choose freedom. I do it for free, you. Every time I choose freedom, I do for you. I do it for me.
I do it for me and I do it for the world. I’m going to do it for the world. So take a what I’d like for you to do now and for anybody who’s listening, this is a really great opportunity to because collectively we’re listening to your story. And thank you, Jill. She says thanks to her and Roger for your openness, just so you know. So anybody who’s listening, if you can do this with Roger and I, it’s a really powerful group that has witnesses that you can do at the same time or even if you’re listening to this later on on another day or anything else, I take the opportunity to this breath because as Roger’s integrating and releasing whatever he needs to integrate and release, we are to and we are collectively.
So I’m going to get you to do a Haubrich, Roger, and you and everyone else, and you do it by inhaling through the nose. And then exhaling with a ha ha. And then reading it again and exhaling with a hug. And then one more time to the nose and exhaling with a hug. Okay, so how are you feeling? It felt good, the breath helped. I was like hoping that we’d be doing some movement or something to get my energy moving.
And so the other thing that you can do, which can be really helpful, especially for you, Roger, is to actually stand up and just shake the body and just shake your legs, shake your arms, just kind of like give it, you know, just shake shake it up and then go for a walk. It’s nice outside if you can get outside to move your energy.
Yeah, I know you’re going to be doing a cat webcast tonight, and I’m not sure if we invite the people here to the webcast so they could come for sure.
Yeah, the call is I’ll put I’ll post it on my Facebook page for anybody who’s interested. And if you want to join, there’s a meeting today that Roger Roger’s leading. And so Roger does some some deep work as well.
So thank you so much, Roger, for participating and and to demonstrate to people how you can go in. And, you know, I did a more detailed version, but sometimes you don’t need to be that detailed immunises. Thanks, Roger, for being so vulnerable with us. It brought tears to my eyes. Thanks for this broadcast. It was very enlightening. And you’re welcome.
It was it was nice for me to experience some of this.
I find it a bit difficult because I do much the same work you do and there are not a lot of practitioners working this deep. So thank you very much.
It’s my pleasure. Absolutely. I look forward to doing more work with you in other ways, that’s for sure. So what I’m going to do is I’m going to wrap this up. I think that this is quite a lot to have had to listen through to this recording. Again, I’ll have it posted on Facebook so you can listen to it again. Just as a reminder for some of the tips, if you if you tuned in later in the in the live webinar, make sure you check out what was happening before, because I gave a lot of of how tos of staying in your power.
And so I’m so grateful that Roger blessed all of us by participating in this way. I believe in the divine timing of everything. And and and so it was a real gift, a real treasure. And so thank you to all for participating. And my intention is to do a live webinar every day. I haven’t been able to do exactly every day, but almost every day. So please go to my website, sign up for the newsletter so you’ll you’ll know when I’m doing these broadcasts.
They happen at different times during the day. I’m trying to capture people depending on their work schedule and their and their daytime schedule. So sometimes it’s in the morning, sometimes afternoon, sometimes evening. My website is Torreblanca dot com and I look forward to sharing some more time with you. Again, so much love to all of you. Blessings to your family. Blessings to you, to your your own life’s.
Blessings to humanity, to take care of.